Memory Trigger Train

Yes, I know it's Monday. Consider this a special edition!

So last night, I was scrolling Facebook and Brian Littrell shared a video someone had of him doing "You Alone." (His Instagram and Facebook are linked, so I didn't get to actually listen until I saw his Instagram a few minutes later.) This gave me all the feels.

I used to have all his solo stuff. I had it all digitally and most of the physical albums they were on. This post of his made me cry. Because I remembered literally the day before the fire picking up his Welcome Home album, holding it in my hand, and then putting it back on the nightstand. I was debating putting it in my car. I opted not to. Oh, how I should have! The next day, it was gone! I have been trying and trying to find this album, new in package for months now. It's not in my price point. I don't want to drop mad cash for someone's used. I want it new. Amazon is just not my friend right now. Neither is eBay.

Anyway, this morning, I see a second post from him where he seems to be indicating someone was post-jacking or making his post more than what it was. It was simply him saying he got what he needed at that moment from his own song. Yeah, got that. Well, that brought back another memory. Yet another one that makes me cry.

This is back in 2007. I saw Brian solo when he was the main act with ONE album out. Yeah, record execs are funny like that, but I didn't care. I also got to see Brandon Heath. The show seriously wasn't that long. But no one cared. I was in the THIRD ROW! He was literally close enough for me to throw something at. (I didn't.) It was so moving that night. There's one moment that sticks in my mind. He sang a cover. (Yeah, rare, I know.) But more so than that, was the fact that he was overcome during that song. So much so he couldn't get the words out. Now if you've been following this man as long as I have, you know that just DOES NOT HAPPEN. Even in 2013 when he was struggling with his voice, he still got the words out, even if it wasn't the way he wanted. This was a moment. One of those moments that happen because there's a tug at your heart. So what was the song: Tim McGraw's "Don't Take the Girl." Go Google the lyrics if you don't know the song and I think you can figure out the moment he lost it.

I can't listen to that song now. Not because of that. But because I BECAME that moment that Brian lost it in that song, almost six years ago. Six years ago on Thursday, my daughter was born at 28 weeks. Six years ago on Thursday, I had lost half my blood volume. Six years ago on Thursday, had we waited another ten minutes, we both probably wouldn't be here.

So why this memory trigger train? I don't know. All I know is that God obviously knew I needed that. And He KNEW, as he always has.

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

-- Jeremiah 29:11