#TeamLittrell 20 Years Ago Tonight

Twenty years ago tonight, I went to my second Backstreet Boys concert. It was in San Diego. A full eight to nine-hour drive AWAY from where I lived at the time. This was back when I was in college and had time and friends and a job that would allow me to do these things. (Driving and/or flying to see the BSB now is WAY more complicated with kids and being a single mom!)

Anyway, some things happened at that show that I will NEVER forget!

1. Howie (ever the one to mess up on stage) wished us a Happy Thanksgiving AND a Happy Easter! We love you, Howie! Don't ever change!
2. Nick asked us if we wanted to get pinched. Hey, this was the Black and Blue tour. We weren't wearing green!
3. I had specifically purchased these tickets to be at a certain location in the arena. No, I could not afford the front row. But I didn't want the front row. After one show (in Sacramento), I knew where I wanted to be. I wanted to be in the back, off the mini-stage at about the first-row balcony.

This was my ticket stub:

Okay, so I wasn't the FIRST row of the balcony, but the third-row was close enough. I had a reason for this!

The reason is this:

In this video, Brian talks about waving to fans. HE DID THIS TO ME! Here are my thoughts on that night from 2001:

I bought myself a HEALTHY HEART CLUB tee-shirt before the show. When the BOYS came out to the mini-stage at the back of the arena, I happened to glance down and saw NICK's back! It was the shirt that gave him away! When the BOYS appeared on the mini-stage, everyone in our section stood up, including the girl in front of me. She decided to wave a sign at them! (How she got it in, I don't know!) So this meant that I couldn't see! So I had to stand on my toes! The people behind us were pissed, but hello, their daughter was screaming, and I do mean, screaming, right in my ear! Well, we were right at the BOYS' eye level, so HOWIE waved at us! Then KEVIN pointed to the sign and waved above it, at us, not the crazy girl in front of us. Now, I had put on my HEALTHY HEART CLUB tee-shirt over my other shirt and was the ONLY ONE in our section wearing white. BRIAN saw this and as we were waving at him, he waved back So I waved with both arms. BRIAN saw this and repeated the action! BRIAN PLAYED MONKEY SEE, MONKEY DO WITH US!!!! Oh, now I can really die happy!

This was the beginning of my quest to MEET this man! It started 20 years ago and I have SLOWLY been inching my way closer to him! ONE day, I WILL get my hug!

FanGirl Friday: What I Believe

I don't usually discuss current events, politics, or things like that on this blog. I try to keep it focused on fun. But on occasion, I feel the need to say something. This may be a weird, rambling post.

If you've set foot out of your house within the past week or two or taken a glance at any social media platform, you may have seen or heard what happened with George Floyd. I'm not here to dive deep into it. I will say that it was wrong on so many levels. I'm also not here to dive deep into the protests. I'm also not going to talk about my political or religious views surrounding the events of George Floyd's death or the protests.

But there are a few things that I want to share.

1. No matter WHAT you believe about what happened or the protests and violence going on, I am going to say this: I love you. I don't care who you voted for. Who you are going to vote for. What color you are. What your religion is. It doesn't matter to me. No, I am not "color blind." I see you, People of Color. I understand that you have oppressed for far too long. I may not have been in your shoes or experienced what you have, but know that I see you.
2. To those of you who want to get upset with celebrities who are vocal about their choices that oppose your own, I don't understand you. I'm speaking specifically in regards to whatever it was that broke out on Twitter Wednesday night. I'm not on Twitter much, but apparently, there were some haters hating on Brian and Leighanne Littrell because they are VERY Republican. I know this. I DON'T CARE! Yes, I follow Leighanne on Facebook but I tend to scroll past a lot of her posts. Do I agree with her on a lot of it? NO! But I love her nonetheless. Now, I may not have seen what erupted on Twitter, but I did see this post. So quit hating! Hating on them is similar to what is going on. It's not the same, but by trying to bully someone for their views, you obviously just don't understand.
   
   

View this post on Instagram

It doesn’t take a lot to find happiness in things,people and places. In the craziness of the world today, the way people are lashing out at each other saddens me. No matter who I voted for or what religion I am, I am a person.... a person that has feelings and beliefs as well as quite a difficult life growing up but I prevailed and made the most of every situation and this is why I can take all your loving and hateful comments...... they are direct reflections of you So good or bad there it is. These pictures I find happiness in and comfort in my home💕 I love and thank all of you for having my best interest at heart and just know the love goes both ways💖💕💖#loveyourself #forgiveness #compassion

A post shared by Leighanne (@leighanne_littrell) on Jun 3, 2020 at 4:08pm PDT

3. And furthermore, did you not see that these two celebs joined the #BlackOutTuesday movement? Okay, maybe they don't believe ALL of it. Baylee obviously doesn't quite get WHY Colin Kaepernick kneeled during the National Anthem but he understands SOME of it. And he is still young and developing his own views. If you want to know more about Colin's kneeling or why there are looting and rioting or anything else, EDUCATE YOURSELF. This has been going on for centuries!
   
   

View this post on Instagram

🖤

A post shared by Baylee Littrell (@bayleelittrell_music) on Jun 1, 2020 at 3:49pm PDT

4. I'm beyond proud of Kevin (and AJ) right now for being so vocal! Yes, I fall more on his side than I do the Littrells, but I don't love them less because I don't agree with them.

All this being said, I am who I am. I believe what I do. I believe Black Lives Matter. I believe Love is Love. I believe in Science. I believe Kindness is Everything. You do not have to believe like me. You are free to believe what you wish. But know it doesn't change the way I feel about you.

FanGirl Friday: SQUEE!!!!

SO MUCH SQUEE in this FanGirl Friday, you may want to cover your ears! So, by now you've heard:

DNA WORLD TOUR RESCHEDULED!

Yes, the tour has been rescheduled! I was literally in a work meeting and THANKFULLY we were in a breakout room. But I feel bad for my team because their leader squealed like a crazy woman! So anyway, I was in this room with my staff, and my phone buzzed beside me. I glanced at it and saw that it was the BSB Insider so I opened it. And literally squealed on camera! Yeah, GREAT impression to make! But they'll get to know me and how crazy I am!

Anyway, so my Facebook Timeline has essentially EXPLODED BSB! Yes, everyone has to repost what the guys posted 8 bazillion times! But that's okay! One thing I can say for this reschedule is it is LONG! It starts on June 7 and goes to September 12! It's ALL SUMMER!

So here is the video:

And then here is the image of the dates:

I'm super excited that my rescheduled date is a Saturday! I might be able to go! I hadn't bought my tickets yet because I was trying to figure things out and then it got postponed so I waited. And now, yes, I do still have some stuff to figure out but I would LOVE to see them again! So now I just wait a bit and see what happens. Hopefully, I'll be able to get tickets after summer work and be all ready for the crazy that is ANOTHER BSB show!

FanGirlFriday: Not Very FanGirl Feeling

This is not the happiest of FanGirl Fridays on the planet. Why? Well, Tuesday THIS announcement came:

Honestly, I was expecting it. They had had two of their shows postponed (Hollywood and Lexington) by the venues. They had to say something soon or else more was going to get out before they did it themselves.
My show was supposed to be August 16. I hadn't bought my tickets. Why? Well, I didn't have everything worked out yet. See, it's hard when you are a single mom working to support your family. Everything has to line up for things like this. Yeah, I did sit in my leadership team meeting with my tablet and phone out in the "waiting room" for FanClub presale. But I didn't buy. I didn't even buy on Valentine's Day when the main sale opened up. And now, well, I guess I'll just wait until next week to see what they say about rescheduled dates. Hopefully, I'll be able to go then.

FanGirl Friday: Missing the Tour

The DNA World Tour started a year ago this week. WOW! Has it really been a year already? Hard to believe that this craziness of a world tour is a year old! Now, the Boys are supposed to be on tour now. But alas, due to this virus currently going on, they're not. They're quarantined just like the rest of us.

They had to postpone the last show of the South American leg. Then they postponed the Australian leg a whole YEAR! The last show of the US leg was just postponed by the venue. (Still no word from the Boys yet.) I'm fearing that with the way things are going, most, if not all, of the US leg is going to be postponed. But alas, we wait for the "official" announcement. The fact that the Boys didn't just straight-up cancel back in March just shows how much they love us and love doing their jobs.

And we are not the only ones missing the tour. Nope! First Brian posted on his Instagram, and it's a true missing his job post!

View this post on Instagram

Getting back out there with y’all is what keeps us going.... can’t wait to be back.... 👍🏼 #mondaymotivation @backstreetboys

A post shared by Brian Littrell (@rokspics) on May 11, 2020 at 1:58pm PDT

And then there was Mr. Quiet. Yes, KEVIN posted! He has hardly posted at all during this time. He's usually pretty quiet unless their sports going on. And since there are no sports, he doesn't post much. But then there's this!

View this post on Instagram

Hard to believe it was exactly 1 year ago (yesterday 👀PS) that we kicked off the #dnaworldtour in Lisboa, Portugal 🇵🇹! Looking forward to getting back out there when the time is right. ✌🏻❤️ y’all! #backstreetboysdnaworldtour

A post shared by Kevin Richardson (@kevinscottrichardson) on May 12, 2020 at 5:41pm PDT

So yeah, even they are missing us and being on the road! We are not alone in this...

Graphics

As you may have noticed, I make graphics. No, I don't have a degree in graphic design. I didn't buy an expensive graphic manipulation program. Instead, I use Canva. I've been using Canva for graphics for years. All the graphics on this page are made from there. Sometimes I use their stock photos, sometimes my own and sometimes photos I've found. I've also made all my covers for my novels on it as well as other things.

I also make graphics for the groups I own and moderate.

My group devoted to my favorite family, the Littrells: Littrell Love

The group I moderate: BSB Fans United

Now, here's the thing. Sometimes I make graphics that I don't care if they get snagged and shared. Those I don't tag those with the group name. Example: my quarantine graphics:

But sometimes, I DO CARE. Like, for example: 

I made some Instagram/Facebook interactive story panes. You save them, fill them in, and share them to your stories. I hashtagged them with the tag we created for the Boys' anniversary and our name right in the bottom. I mean, yeah, sometimes they don't take much to do, but sometimes they do! And if it's something that I'm doing SPECIFIC for one of my groups, I want to make sure we get the credit and acknowledgment.

So imagine my surprise when I find MY graphics in other groups! Sometimes I find them by accident. But when I'm a MEMBER OF A GROUP that it's being shared in, it kinda annoys me. Yes, I will share my graphics around. I don't have a problem with it. Just ask me. I'll gladly share it. What bugs me is when people crop the tags off and then share them. And when I call them on it, said people block me and kick me out of their group. It's just annoying.

So, here's the deal, and this goes for ANYONE who is making graphics. Before you share them, ASK or COMMENT on their graphic to let them know! Maybe they'll friend you and wanna be tagged. Maybe they'll just want a screenshot to know where you shared it. Be considerate people.

Quarantined: #AloneTogether with Baylee Littrell

Brian and the fam had been pretty quiet on social media this week. I was getting restless! But then Thursday night, they go all "food post" on me. First Leighanne with what we'll call "The Before." I guess they took the "leftover challenge." Nope. Not one for me! And Baylee legitimately looks terrified to eat his mother's cooking!

View this post on Instagram

What’s in your fridge?😂 #leftoverchallenge tag me!

A post shared by Leighanne (@leighanne_littrell) on May 7, 2020 at 6:42pm PDT

But apparently, it wasn't bad because Brian gave us "The After" shot:

View this post on Instagram

Hated it!!!! Can’t you tell.... wow is it possible to have leftovers for leftover? That was amazing..... #leftoverchallenge 🤪

A post shared by Brian Littrell (@rokspics) on May 7, 2020 at 7:02pm PDT

And yeah, there were a couple of posts before that too, but all in all, Brian had been silent. And his post before this one was just a text post!

And both of these were literally right before I went to bed. And after I did go to bed, Bay drops this sweet thing on me:

View this post on Instagram

Here is a clip of me with the boys and my tiny microphone 15 years ago.Thank you for finding this @yahtzee27 😂time goes by too fast...

A post shared by Baylee Littrell (@bayleelittrell_music) on May 7, 2020 at 11:02pm PDT

This is like the sweetest little thing! THIS is how I see Baylee in my head. Two years old. Mop of blonde curls. Sometimes it's hard to see him as the almost-adult he is today. He's grown up WAY TOO FAST!

Okay, that was what I woke up to on Friday morning. Then came Friday afternoon.

I was just finishing work on Friday and getting back onto Facebook. See, I close all my socials so I can actually work. (Yes, I do most of the time keep my music on.) So as I was doing this, scrolling through Facebook, I see this post pop up from both Brian and Baylee. Apparently, Baylee did a vid for CMT! Oh, this made my heart happy. And I was even happier that it was my THREE FAVORITE SONGS from his album: "Come Kiss Me," "Boxes," and "Nobody Tells Ya." *sigh* It literally just made my Friday!


So, there I sat on a Friday afternoon, enjoying my favorite Boys. What a great way to go into the weekend!

FanGirl Friday: BSB Around the World

Back in November 2000, BSB did something crazy. They went around the world in 100 hours to promote their new album, "Black and Blue." They did a DVD of said trip. There was even a board game! Yes, BSB had a board game! I owned it.

When I left my ex, I left with the bare essentials. I then had him eventually pack up everything else. Well, apparently, something got left. When I was digging through all my boxes, I never found my BSB game. I thought it must have gotten lost when we moved from SoCal back home so I let it go.

Somewhere after the fire, I think, my kids told me about this "Backstreet Boys game" that their step-mother had. I told them that I had one at one point too.

So this past Christmas, they told me that the gift they got me while they were at their dad's they actually found in the garage. When I heard that, I kinda guessed it was the game. And low and behold, it was!

Okay, so now on to the next part of this game story. Our sitter lost her mom back in October. She was finally cleaning through her mom's things and said she found something that I just needed to have. She came over to visit a couple weeks back and brought said thing, which happened to be THIS GAME! The only difference is that the inside of the game her mom had is STILL FACTORY! Yes, all the pieces are still in the bags. The stickers were never put on the die. Yeah, the box isn't in the greatest condition, but still! So now, I have TWO of these when I thought I had lost it so many years ago!

Sire: The NaNo 2018 Project

Back in September/October of 2018, I had an idea. It started with this video:

There was also this idea I had way back in the day where Howie was the leader of a vampire clan. (Think Kindred: The Embraced.) So I thought, why not combine the two ideas. Major difference: I had to have Kevin in this fic! Similarities: red eyes, Day Walkers, Gentri and that was about it. Beyond that, the story was my own.

I had an idea about how I thought it would go. November started and I took off on this 50k word adventure! It was the first time I had written BSB fanfic in years! By the end of the first week, I was three days ahead in my word count. The CD lived in my car. I listened to the song constantly! Words were flowing out of me! But then, the fire happened. I didn't write for three days, and when I did write, it was strange. I could sometimes get words and sometimes couldn't. I chalked it up to stress and kept pushing through. I managed to get to 30k in my story. I took that as a win with all that had happened. On top of that, that was about what I averaged for these events.

But when I went back and reread what I had written in the remaining weeks of November going into December, I realized the story had changed drastically. No longer was the plot I had started with the plot that it was following. Instead, it had become a subplot to something darker and more sinister. I went with it. It seemed to help.

I got stuck around a year ago in chapter 17, the climax of the story. I didn't want it to be told entirely from the main character's point of view. Plus, it just needed to be done right. So instead I worked on chapter 18. I figured knowing what was going to happen after would help drive what happened in that chapter. Almost six months later, I finished that dreaded piece. It then became ending this story. I had parts written. I dabbled in it. But I guess part of me didn't want to finish it yet. This was the story that had gotten me through the fire. Finally, in January of this year, I finished chapter 19. I knew then that it was all downhill from there. The last two parts were practically written.

But alas, another project had taken my interest. So I put it on the back burner. I got pressure to finish it from all over. But it just wasn't coming. Finally, after I finished the one project that had taken my interest, I decided to come back to "Sire." And guess what? It practically finished itself! I worked on it for two days and in both those two days, I managed to finish chapter 20 and the epilogue! In the timespan of a week, I had finished TWO monster stories! So here are the deets on this story:

Title: Sire
Final Word Count: 81,492
Summary: Howie is the leader of a clan of Day Walkers, half-human, half-vampires who are tasked with enforcing vampire law in Las Vegas. His clan is composed of his adviser, Kevin; his tracker, Nick; his messenger, Alex; and Brian, his new pet. They've been together for twenty-five years and things are just now coming to light. Having taken Brian as his pet, Howie is beginning to realize just how broken he is. He also realizes that Brian needs to reclaim his power over his past. But there are demons in the way; demons that seem to be coming back to haunt them. As the lawbreakers, or Gentri, seem to be growing in numbers, the leader of the vampires, Carson, is growing impatient with his Day Walker clans. He orders more clans to be brought in to help with the problem. One of the new clans, however, has ties to Brian that threatens to undo all the work Howie has done with him.

Want to read it? Read it here.

NaNoWriMo 2019

I realized that since I hadn't updated this blog in like a year, I hadn't had a chance to talk about NaNoWriMo last November!

So, a brief history: NaNoWriMo (or National Novel Writing Month) is held every November. The goal is to write a 50k novel in 30 days. I've been participating since 2003. I have only won once in 2004. I took 2016 off because I was beyond busy with school and two jobs and everything that even thinking of an idea was overwhelming! And 2018 was starting to be a year I thought I might actually win. Then the stupid fire happened. I didn't write for THREE days. I wound up managing to get 30k that year. So I guess that was a win, being I was homeless and all.

So that brings us to 2019, last year. Now if you've followed me in any of my writing circles, you know that I suffer from this awful plague of never finishing ANYTHING! Well, I guess I just needed a "tribe" of other writers to propel me. Because suddenly, in April of last year, I began to *gasp* finish things. So I thought that maybe this year for NaNoWriMo, I MIGHT finish a story!

After toying around with ideas, I settled on this one:

Essentially, the plot was my usual idea: Destroy Brian's life! (I do this a lot in many different ways!) But this time, I wanted each chapter to be a song title. And since DNA was their latest album and I had seen them in concert in August (that pic is MINE from the nosebleed seats!), I figured that the chapters should be titled after their songs. (All but one is.)

So I undertook this idea. I planned. I created a playlist. I wrote the minimum amount of words and more on some days. There were days I totally didn't think I was going to be able to do this. I had those in my "tribe" not understanding that, yes, I was pushing myself extremely hard, but I wanted to! And yet, I persisted. And I actually did two things:

1. Wrote 50k in words by the 28th of November!
2. Finished the story!

This was a huge deal in my mind. I hadn't won NaNoWriMo in 15 years! I had literally dozens of started stories that I had never finished! (Including the one from 2018!) Sadly, most of those were lost in the fire. But SOME survived in the cloud or email. So I've been able to salvage some of my works in progress.

But THIS. This was monumental! I actually FINISHED a story AND won NaNo in the same month!

Wanna read my NaNo winner? It's here!

Quarantined: Baylee's Boxes

Ok, couple things about this song, "Boxes." One, I LOVE IT!!!!! Two, there are TWO versions of it. Three, there are two videos for it, one for each version. And four, well, there is no four. It's just a dang cute song and so perfect for Baylee.

Moving on. When they released the "615" version, (yes, Baylee will teach you your area codes: 770 = Atlanta, 615 = Nashville), they released a video with it. It's a bunch of stuff from the tour and is just super cute.

So, when the family released the video, they sent it to CMT. CMT picked it up and put it into the rotation. They've been stalking CMT waiting for it to air. (If I had CMT, I'd be doing it too!) So while they were prepping for their ET interview (See this post.), it aired! Brian, being the good dad who KNOWS how important THIS moment is, recorded it for us! (See it here.)

And being it's now in rotation AND getting airtime, that means he qualifies for the weekly fan-favorite countdown: CMT 12 Pack. And guess what? HE MADE IT ON IT last Friday at NUMBER 6! (Again, Dad's got us on this one, but the whole fam put on Instagram too! See it here.) And what's even better, YOU CAN GO VOTE FOR HIM!!!!! The best thing, you can vote multiple times!!!! So, what are you still doing reading this? Go VOTE!

FanGirl Friday: Digital Repop

As you may know, I lost everything, including my BSB CD collection. (See this post for a refresher.) When I bought my car a year ago, it HAD to have a CD player. The only CDs that survived the fire were whatever was in my car, which happened to be Unbreakable, This is Us, and NKOTBSB. I have been slowly replacing all my CDs. And with the help of my friends, I have finally accomplished it! I've had some pretty awesome things happen over the course of getting this collection replaced.

Like being able to get Brian's Welcome Home CD because Brian went all comment lock-down on an Instagram post. (I talked about it here.) Yeah, that was kinda cool. I got to chatting with a fan on his FB page about it and how I had two copies of it. I can even picture the one I had sitting on my nightstand the morning of the fire that was unopened. And we got to talking and she said she had a copy and would send it to me!

I also had my BSB Tribe send me the rest of the CDs to complete my collection. That was pretty awesome! It was a complete surprise that they did that for me!

The coolest thing with that is I finally listened to In a World Like This. Yes, I'll admit, I hadn't listened to that album AT ALL! See, I got it back in 2013 when it came out. But I left my ex shortly afterward. I don't know what happened to that album. But I have now finally listened to it!

Probably the strangest thing that transpired over the course of this journey happened when I tried to replace the original Backstreet Boys album from 1994/95 era. (i.e. The Red Album.) I got with a couple of ideas in mind. One, hearing Nick sing all high pitched pre-pubescent on "Let's Have a Party." And two, hearing Brian sing BOTH verses on "Quit Playin' Games."

So I got the album from the post office and popped it in my car. The first indication that something was wrong should have been that my car "read" the album. It was literally telling me the songs on the display. But then when I got to "Quit Playin' Games," that's when I noticed something wrong. Nick sang the second verse! Yep! I got a digital repop of this album! *sigh* Oh well, I guess I'll take it. My chances of finding an original like I had are extremely slim!

27 Years!

I cannot believe I am writing this post! How is it that these guys have been doing this for 27 years? It just amazes me!

A little history lesson here. Let's get it from THE Boy's mouth that it happened to!

Brian was the last member to join. And he's my favorite. He has been since 1999. Yes, I have been a fan since 1999. The Millennium era. *sigh*

But, I have known about them for longer. See, back in 1992, I seem to remember a blurb on my Top 40 station. The DJ said that he had found an ad that said a guy in Orlando, Florida was looking for singers to form a New Kids on the Block type group. Why is this relevant to BSB history? Because when you ask Nick how old he was when he met the guys, he always says "12." Nick and I are the same age. So if Brian didn't join until 1993, he would've been 13.

Anyway, here's Brian and Nick talking about the day they first met. (This is from the Singapore concert. Brian actually drops the date.)

These guys hold a special place in my heart. Why? I'm not entirely sure. They are real, down to earth guys. They're all dads. They're amazing at what they do.

I mean, who would've thought that we would have "eras" of the Boys! The "Millennium Era," the "Vegas Era," the "Era without Kevin," the "NKOTBSB Era," etc! It's just incredible! And now we are in a NEW "era": DNA! How blessed we are to be living in a world like this. (No pun intended.)

The only thig I know is that I will always be a fan.

Quarantined: Birthday Edition!

Yesterday was my birthday! For anyone wondering, I'm the same age as Nick!

I woke up to so much fangirl love it was incredible!

The first was a drawing by my friend, Kimm!

Then it was a graphic from my friend, Jill!

And Heather wrote me a story! Read it here!

I got a ton of love from work! Including a personalized graphic from my work birthday twin!

And we can't forget the Boys! They started the month by sending me this:

And then I got a text message today too!

And then to just put the icing on my cake, there was a post by Brian where Baylee was singing. *sigh* Find it on his Facebook Page.

And of course, he drops an AWESOME pic last night. Okay, not shirtless, because apparently when he gets the good weather (last week), my weather sucks and then we trade right now! 😂

Think I just found my next cross-stitch! Sigh. Love the fangirl birthday love I got!