Wednesday, March 17, 2021

#TeamLittrell 20 Years Ago Tonight

Twenty years ago tonight, I went to my second Backstreet Boys concert. It was in San Diego. A full eight to nine-hour drive AWAY from where I lived at the time. This was back when I was in college and had time and friends and a job that would allow me to do these things. (Driving and/or flying to see the BSB now is WAY more complicated with kids and being a single mom!)

Anyway, some things happened at that show that I will NEVER forget!

  1. Howie (ever the one to mess up on stage) wished us a Happy Thanksgiving AND a Happy Easter! We love you, Howie! Don't ever change!
  2. Nick asked us if we wanted to get pinched. Hey, this was the Black and Blue tour. We weren't wearing green!
  3. I had specifically purchased these tickets to be at a certain location in the arena. No, I could not afford the front row. But I didn't want the front row. After one show (in Sacramento), I knew where I wanted to be. I wanted to be in the back, off the mini-stage at about the first-row balcony.
This was my ticket stub:

Okay, so I wasn't the FIRST row of the balcony, but the third-row was close enough. I had a reason for this!

The reason is this:

In this video, Brian talks about waving to fans. HE DID THIS TO ME! Here are my thoughts on that night from 2001:

I bought myself a HEALTHY HEART CLUB tee-shirt before the show. When the BOYS came out to the mini-stage at the back of the arena, I happened to glance down and saw NICK's back! It was the shirt that gave him away! When the BOYS appeared on the mini-stage, everyone in our section stood up, including the girl in front of me. She decided to wave a sign at them! (How she got it in, I don't know!) So this meant that I couldn't see! So I had to stand on my toes! The people behind us were pissed, but hello, their daughter was screaming, and I do mean, screaming, right in my ear! Well, we were right at the BOYS' eye level, so HOWIE waved at us! Then KEVIN pointed to the sign and waved above it, at us, not the crazy girl in front of us. Now, I had put on my HEALTHY HEART CLUB tee-shirt over my other shirt and was the ONLY ONE in our section wearing white. BRIAN saw this and as we were waving at him, he waved back So I waved with both arms. BRIAN saw this and repeated the action! BRIAN PLAYED MONKEY SEE, MONKEY DO WITH US!!!! Oh, now I can really die happy!

This was the beginning of my quest to MEET this man! It started 20 years ago and I have SLOWLY been inching my way closer to him! ONE day, I WILL get my hug!

Saturday, January 16, 2021

#TeamLittrell: There's a Disturbance in the Fandom

There's a disturbance in the Fandom.

Do you feel it?

It started because ONE MAN did something SO MINOR that at any other time, it probably wouldn't have even been noticed.

But now, there's so much unrest over it. Some of the things I have seen:

  • Fans unfollowing him and his family.
  • Fans selling their tickets.
  • Fans saying they will no longer post solo pictures of him on their socials.
  • Fans saying they won't stand near him at Meet and Greets.
  • Fans saying that they "support the rest of the guys but not him."
All of this, I could maybe be okay with. Some of it really hurts to hear fans saying and frankly I'm not sure how you can say that you "support the rest of the guys but not him." I mean, he's not exactly out doing solo stuff like some of the others are. If you buy their merch, attend their concerts, etc, he's still getting 1/5 of that.

The thing that hurts more is that now there are fans out there calling for his removal. There are fans out there that are bullying other fans because of their support. I have a very weird feeling in the pit of my stomach every time I promote my group (Littrell Love on Facebook). 

The fact that she closed her Twitter! 

And now there are tabloid articles saying that the cousins are at odds with each other.

It all hurts my heart. I mean, yes, I have been asked by people if I really do love Leighanne. (My fanfiction tends to lean a certain way...) And once I explain that I really do and I have for a very long time, those people tend to get over it.

At this moment, I'm proud to say that I am making friends with people who are close to the family. Not that that was ever my intent. But I'm glad to see that there are others out there who are supporting the family and who know that you can love someone regardless. I tend to stay away from the groups that are spewing hatred toward him and his family. I am backing my friends and their endeavors. And I am still paying attention to other things within the fandom. I have not unfollowed sites and groups that are begging for his removal or saying they aren't going to support him anymore. Why? Because if there is any chatter I hear that something is going to come out to hurt this family, I WILL rally the troops.

This song has been going through my head since this whole thing broke: 

Why? Because THEY christened us the BSB Army. Back during "Black and Blue," they were asked about the title. They said they wanted something iconic, like "The White Album." (Sorry Boys... That didn't quite happen!) But they also said that then they could call us the "Black and Blue Army." Well, over the years, it transitioned to the BSB Army. And we are Soldiers in that Army. (Yes, I know this is Brian's least favorite song on that album.)

I'm saying this now: I will support this family. No matter what. I have been tasked to love all people, regardless. That is what I'm doing. You may not agree with me, and that's okay. But I am a proud soldier in the BSB Army. I will stand by my man. I am a member of #TeamLittrell for life!

Friday, January 15, 2021

FanGirl Friday: Frick & Frack

So let's talk Frick & Frack. First, Nick had some mega news this week:

They're expecting baby #3!!!!!

OMG! Talk about surprising, amazing, and so exciting!

Honestly, I was kinda expecting it, but I wasn't completely convinced that Lauren was pregnant either. I figured that they would tell us if they were when they were ready. So yeah, they were ready! We still don't know the sex of the baby, but the Carters do! They just aren't giving it up yet.

Anyway, I'm SOOOOO happy for them!

Moving on to Frick & Frack! And, no, I'm not talking about Brian and Nick. I'm talking about "The Frick & Frack Show"! This podcast is a couple of guys who talk about the Boys. They started back in March or April. I remember their first show. Well, here it is, almost a year later and they finally pulled off something that NO OTHER FAN PODCAST HAS DONE:


Okay, that wasn't their intent. Their intent was simply to interview Leighanne Littrell. Okay, I know this lady. If Husband is around, she'll eventually call out for him because that's just who she is and the depth of their relationship. So, just on a whim, she's all like, "Do you mind if Husband says hi?" I really don't think these guys were gonna say No!

But these guys handled themselves LIKE PROS! They were amazing! I could go on about them, but I won't. Instead, I'll just share their podcast from earlier this week. It made me SO happy!

Just watch below!

Wednesday, January 13, 2021

#TeamLittrell When the Fandom Lets You Down... Find this Post

Almost two years ago, I wrote this post. I never really followed up on the first part. Because something happened because of that Instagram post that was incredible!

For a little history lesson, read this post.

After you've done that, lemme tell you this. I lost everything in the fire. The only thing I really wanted to replace was my CD collection. It took me FOREVER to find Brian's solo album. Amazon and eBay were NOT my friends at that time. I downloaded it from Amazon after his post that night, but I still wanted the physical copy of the album for my car.

So after Brian locked his comments on the post, I went to his Facebook to see what happened. Over the course of a few comments (because comments were still open on Facebook), I found a fan who was interested in my story. I wasn't fishing, but we got to talking. I told her how I couldn't find Brian's solo album for less than $30 (at that time). She was shocked. She said she had it on her shelf and she felt bad it was gathering dust. So she asked for my address.

Four days later, this came in the mail:

This fan who didn't know me from the next person on the street sent me HER copy of this album, no questions asked. No cash exchanged. NOTHING!

To me, THIS is what the fandom is all about. Fans helping fans. 

So when the fandom lets me down and starts doing crazy things like they've been doing lately towards Brian, THIS is the story that reminds me that there are people out there who are kind and caring and will help others.

And all that being said, I used to be able to listen to this album STRAIGHT THROUGH without skips. I can't do that anymore. There are two songs that break my heart; one song I did to myself, the other just makes me bawl. But I still LOVE this album. I miss having my still sealed copy. And I miss this one the most: 

Yep. A signed copy of it. *sigh* Oh well. That one may never be replaced. But at least I have one copy again.

Sunday, January 10, 2021



I have been a fan of the Backstreet Boys since 1999. I've actually known about them since 1992. (Yeah, weird story on that one!) Anyway, I have been a fan since I heard the song "Larger than Life." And when I saw the video, I became an instant Brian fan! Yeah, a few short months later he announced his engagement. I cried. Call it a dream that I knew would never come true. But I got over it... quickly. I started learning not only all I could about Brian but about this woman who made him happy. Sometime around my birthday that year (2000), I came to grips with his choice. It didn't change a thing in my mind. Okay, one less "eligible bachelor" off the market.

As time went on, I continued to love him and the group. Yeah, I went through a short Nick phase and an even shorter AJ phase, but Brian was my main man when it came to those Boys.

Over the years, my obsessiveness waxed and waned with their hiatuses. They never broke up. I never quit being a fan. I bought his solo record like 3 times! I supported his wife's business. I saw him live solo from like the 4th row! Even when he struggled with his voice, it didn't stop me. I am #TeamLittrell till the day I die!

That being said, yeah, he kinda disappointed me the other day by saying he was on Parler. But I can't blame him. He was reacting to something he felt was unfair. I've done things like this. Do I think he's right? Eh, probably not. Would I have done it? Eh, probably not. But does that mean I'm going to hate on the man? ABSOLUTELY NOT! Some people are calling for the group to kick him out. Some are saying they won't support him but will support the rest of the group. I don't understand this. So he made a choice you don't agree with. So this platform he joined probably helped in the attempted insurrection on the sixth. But was he a part of that? No. So, you know what, it's not a big deal!

What I can say is that being a Brian fan the past forty-eight hours has been a rollercoaster ride! I didn't know what to think. I didn't know what to feel. AND to top it off, his choice felt like it was dividing the fandom. I have stood up with my fellow Brian lovers against the hate. And thankfully, I am part of a great group of fans who care and understand things. Oddly, I have added a few people to my Littrell Love group over the past 48 hours. I think it's because we are tired of getting picked on and told that we are wrong to love this man and his family.

So, yeah, I'm #TeamLittrell... I have others around me who support him and his family. We will continue to do so.

Friday, January 8, 2021

FanGirl Friday: Still FanGirling... No Matter What


I have been a Backstreet Boys fan since 1999. I have been a Brian fan since that moment. I am STILL a Brian fan over twenty years later.

As of late, there has been a whole lot of negativity surrounding him and his wife.

I don't remember when it started, but it was sometime after the first quarantine was relaxed. Leighanne started sharing her political views on her personal Facebook. I follow her but don't interact much.

Then things kinda blew up around their anniversary. He posted the following:

I’m lucky to be her BOW just a couple days before 20 years together.... I ain’t doing that bad, beauty isn’t just skin deep.... 😘 it’s more than that.... no matter what people say..... πŸ˜‰πŸ’₯#womenrule

Posted by Brian Littrell on Saturday, August 29, 2020

Nothing major. He's just showing off his wife of twenty years! Fans got kinda upset over how overt he was. I didn't care. They had a small get together with family for their anniversary. It was about twenty people. Which for them IS small! People got on them about that. Then Baylee had a show. People freaked out.

Things quieted for a moment. Then the election rolled around. All Hell pretty much broke loose. We all know Brian and Leighanne are Republican. Leighanne had been touting it online. Now, I'm not going to say anything bad, but just say that I don't agree with everything that the 45th president has done. If you feel differently, that is fine. I'm not going to hate you because you disagree with me.

Okay, I managed to make it through the election season. Yeah, there was a lot of hate around. I've been in my BSB group and my own Littrell Love group and just ignoring the negativity. Then the family did a Christmas show shortly after Baylee's birthday. Talk about more hatred. I live in California. There's not a lot you can do in California right now and pretty much since about the week before Christmas. I'm able to go to work (which that in itself is surprising), but other than that, we try not to do a lot. So yes, when I see other states getting to do things like concerts, I'm envious. Gosh, I wanted to go. But I knew for my circumstance, it wouldn't be safe.

New Year's came. More political junk happened. The Littrells were quiet. Then came the roller coaster of emotions today.

I got out of work and checked Instagram. Only to find out that Leighanne was going to be on my favorite Backstreet Boys podcast! See, I have been following "The Frick & Frack Show" from the beginning! Yeah, I can hardly get through a whole episode in one sitting, unless the stars align. But OMG! I am so happy for Matthew and Caleb! This is like HUGE for them! I am BEYOND excited for these two guys!

Now, of course, my fav podcasting boys are going the smart route in this and pre-recording this thing. (Usually they go live!) It's going to be posted sometime on Monday. (Make my Monday why don't ya!) So naturally, this information is ALL OVER the fandom sites! A couple of my fellow Brian fans are also supporters of "The Frick & Frack Show" are also sharing this info around. And wouldn't ya know it... out come the haters. I have been jumping on posts all afternoon defending Leighanne, the Show, and Brian. I know these two guys pretty well now. I know they are going to stay away from the controversy, and if they do bring it up, it will be tactful and not mean or degrading!

That being said, as I was leaving to go get dinner, I got a message on my Facebook. Someone was trying to troll me! I don't remember exactly what was said, but it was along the lines of "whatever Leighanne says will make Brian look bad." In the words of Taylor Swift, "Haters gonna Hate..." 

Frankly, in my mind, this has nothing to do with Leighanne or what she says. It has everything to do with "The Frick & Frack Show." This is like the biggest thing for them! Leighanne has it in her stories! Just simply by Leighanne DOING this means that Brian KNOWS! He KNOWS about these two men! I mean... hello! This is like the closest they are getting to have an actual BACKSTREET BOY on their podcast! And it could literally kick open the door to them having one, or all of them on their show! So yes! I will be watching/listening. I cannot wait!

And then, to make the roller coaster even worse, Brian goes and does this: 

Okay. His life. Not jumping over to that ship to follow him. I haven't heard good things about that platform. It sounds like something I wouldn't be interested in. So, no. I'm not going there. But then again, here I am "defending" him. Not so much in his going there and whatnot. But that it's his choice. Free Speech. In my mind, it doesn't change a lot. I don't love him for his political views. They always say, "don't meet your idols." All I want is a hug. Not to discuss politics with him. There is that list of things you don't talk about at the dinner table: politics, religion, and money. So, we don't talk about it. Instead, we focus on the music, the love, his family. ANYTHING else! I don't love him for his views. I love him for his voice, his humor, his looks, the way he can make me forget about everything else for a few minutes. 

Yes, I am still a Brian fan. I will be until the day I die. NOTHING is going to change that. Until someone can actually prove otherwise, I will continue to believe what I see out of him. His wife is not him. Yes, I love her, but not in the same way. And I know her and I would never be BFFs. But I'm not looking for that. I love her because she makes him happy. Period. It's not that I agree with her. I know she is flawed, just like her husband. But I've been taught to love everyone. And I will continue to love them, no matter what.

Friday, June 5, 2020

FanGirl Friday: What I Believe

I don't usually discuss current events, politics, or things like that on this blog. I try to keep it focused on fun. But on occasion, I feel the need to say something. This may be a weird, rambling post.

If you've set foot out of your house within the past week or two or taken a glance at any social media platform, you may have seen or heard what happened with George Floyd. I'm not here to dive deep into it. I will say that it was wrong on so many levels. I'm also not here to dive deep into the protests. I'm also not going to talk about my political or religious views surrounding the events of George Floyd's death or the protests.

But there are a few things that I want to share.
  1. No matter WHAT you believe about what happened or the protests and violence going on, I am going to say this: I love you. I don't care who you voted for. Who you are going to vote for. What color you are. What your religion is. It doesn't matter to me. No, I am not "color blind." I see you, People of Color. I understand that you have oppressed for far too long. I may not have been in your shoes or experienced what you have, but know that I see you.
  2. To those of you who want to get upset with celebrities who are vocal about their choices that oppose your own, I don't understand you. I'm speaking specifically in regards to whatever it was that broke out on Twitter Wednesday night. I'm not on Twitter much, but apparently, there were some haters hating on Brian and Leighanne Littrell because they are VERY Republican. I know this. I DON'T CARE! Yes, I follow Leighanne on Facebook but I tend to scroll past a lot of her posts. Do I agree with her on a lot of it? NO! But I love her nonetheless. Now, I may not have seen what erupted on Twitter, but I did see this post. So quit hating! Hating on them is similar to what is going on. It's not the same, but by trying to bully someone for their views, you obviously just don't understand.

  3. View this post on Instagram

    It doesn’t take a lot to find happiness in things,people and places. In the craziness of the world today, the way people are lashing out at each other saddens me. No matter who I voted for or what religion I am, I am a person.... a person that has feelings and beliefs as well as quite a difficult life growing up but I prevailed and made the most of every situation and this is why I can take all your loving and hateful comments...... they are direct reflections of you So good or bad there it is. These pictures I find happiness in and comfort in my homeπŸ’• I love and thank all of you for having my best interest at heart and just know the love goes both waysπŸ’–πŸ’•πŸ’–#loveyourself #forgiveness #compassion

    A post shared by Leighanne (@leighanne_littrell) on

  4. And furthermore, did you not see that these two celebs joined the #BlackOutTuesday movement? Okay, maybe they don't believe ALL of it. Baylee obviously doesn't quite get WHY Colin Kaepernick kneeled during the National Anthem but he understands SOME of it. And he is still young and developing his own views. If you want to know more about Colin's kneeling or why there are looting and rioting or anything else, EDUCATE YOURSELF. This has been going on for centuries!

  5. View this post on Instagram


    A post shared by Baylee Littrell (@bayleelittrell_music) on

  6. I'm beyond proud of Kevin (and AJ) right now for being so vocal! Yes, I fall more on his side than I do the Littrells, but I don't love them less because I don't agree with them.
All this being said, I am who I am. I believe what I do. I believe Black Lives Matter. I believe Love is Love. I believe in Science. I believe Kindness is Everything. You do not have to believe like me. You are free to believe what you wish. But know it doesn't change the way I feel about you.